Monday Cardinal Couple -- "It's in the cup."

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MONDAY CARDINAL COUPLE


-Watson on golf


( Special correspondent David Watson brews the coffee for Cardinal Couple this morning. Today, he discusses a "good walk spoiled" -- the art of golf.)

I read recently that UT's Pat Summitt recorded a hole-in-one while playing golf. She was at the Sevierville Golf Club (Sevierville is in Tennessee and is the first town you run into on Hwy 66 headed south to Gatlinburg once you get off of I-40) Pat used a seven-iron on the Par-3, 112-yard third hole on the course. 

This is either a picture of Pat Summitt or "Auntie Sharon"

I've played this particular course before. We would vacation at times in that area when my kids were younger during the summer vacation months and take the kids to Dollywood, the water parks and other attractions in Sevierville, Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg. I would go play either this course, the Gatlinburg Country Club or Cobbly Nob. I usually pulled out the wedge on the hole that Pat aced. I never got close to a hole-in-one, much less stay on the green or get near it. 


I would join up with a two-some or three-some. I played eighteen holes with a guy once who claimed he invented the floppy disc. He should have invested that money he supposedly made in golf lessons. He was a horrible golfer. I haven't been to Sevierville or that area in a few years. I wonder if the divots I left in the fairways down there have healed. 

Pat was golfing with WBB announcer Debbie Antonelli, so we're pretty sure the event happened. She's a pretty credible type. I wonder if the four-some broke out in a rousing rendition of
"Rocky Top" when ball met cup?  


I've golfed for over 35 years. Never had a hole-in-one. I was talking to Paulie, your senile senior columnist here at Cardinal Couple. He had one at the age of 10. He's also bowled a 300 game. He claims to be the only person in history to do both of those things and also marry Sonja. 


Braggart. 

I've gotten close to holes-in-ones before. Last summer I was playing golf with my brother and his buddies in Louisville. We were at Seneca Golf Course and I lofted one up on a par-three there that looked pin-bound. A rarity for me. The ball bounced about ten yards in front of the pin, rolled right by and stopped about two yards from the couple. 


I didn't get the birdie  -- which would make perfect sense to anyone who has ever seen me putt. 

The University of Louisville has a new women's golf coach. She's a cute-looking young gal named Courtney Trimble. She comes from Central Florida and Auburn. She's even bringing her assistant coach with her. I used to like to bring my own caddy when I played. He finally grew up, though, and wanted to get paid for watching me moan, cry, grimace and use words that would get me kicked out of Mass. Kids. Whatcha gonna do with them? He's even threatened to bring in a conflict resolution manager over our current dispute over what a fair wage is for 30 minutes of grass-cutting. He even wants a gas-powered lawnmower. 

Ms. Trimble is taking over a pretty good returning nucleus of Lady Card golfers. Emily Haas and Katie Petrino will be sophomores this fall and were BIG EAST selections as freshmen. They lose two seniors, but Sara Karlsson, Maike Klein, Tara Lyons and Candace Wiley return also.

"On the tee for the Cards....Kaaaaatiieeee
Petrinoooooo!" 

I've never attended a UofL womens golf match. I wonder if the cheerleaders, LadyBirds and Louie the Cardinal Bird show up? Does Sean Moth or Jared Stillman introduce the starters as they take the first tee? Does the Kroger Crew run up and down the fairways tossing out golf towels and tees to the spectators? Is there a halftime intermission after nine holes where the coach stands in front of a white-board and designs shots and addresses putting? 


I'm putting attending a UofL golf match on my bucket list. Hopefully, they'll let me ride in a cart and shout out encouragement with a mouthful of nachos and a cold can of Ensure. 


"Be the ball, Katie! OOOOHHHH P---A---R---S!" 

I also wonder how long Tom Jurich looked for a coach. I've hear that Bobby Petrino is a pretty good golfer. He's available these days. Also, Pat Summitt might have considered the position. I'd love to see that icy stare of hers after Emily recorded a bogie or someone talked too loud during Tara's back-swing. I hope that Courtney does a good job coaching golf for the Cards. And, can you get thrown out of a golf event like you can in basketball or baseball? Are there "technicals" or sideline warnings? 


Someone once described golf has a "good walk spoiled". Some days, it's a pretty apt description. Then, there are those rare moments when a long putt drops or you nail one perfectly down the middle of the fairway. 


I played eighteen Saturday before the Belmont Stakes. Shot a 94 and a had a couple of pars. I was satisfied with that. I counted every stroke, too. Then, my golfing buddies and I went to a local establishment we like and had a few beverages and watched the race. The comradeship was great. The results of the race let something to be desired, despite the exciting finish. 

I'm spending today searching for Optimizer. My hope is that Paulie didn't get the voice-mail I left him about putting my Kentucky Derby winnings he still hasn't paid me for on the D. Wayne Lukas horse. Maybe I could buy Optimizer and ride him around the golf course instead of renting a cart. 


I wonder how comfortable he'd be spending time with me in the woods looking for errant tee shots? I've be-friended most of the squirrels and chipmunks where I normally play but I'm still convinced they hide my tee shots when they land deep in the oak and maple trees. 


Have a good week, CARDINAL COUPLE readers, and don't raise your head when you're in your downswing. 


--David Watson


( Thanks for the commentary, David! Not many know this about David, but he actually played eighteen holes once with a croquet mallet, pool cue and jack-hammer. He still hasn't beat that score. Tuesday Cardinal Couple features Sandy Walker. We're not sure if she plays golf, but we'd bet she'd beat David...regardless.)
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